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The Jewish Meaning of a Birthday and Chabad Customs
Answered by Rav Yaron Chodorov Machine translation · Original
Question
In our family we always celebrated birthdays in a big way: cake, guests, presents. I heard that the Rebbe called for celebrating a birthday, but in a special way. Does a birthday have Jewish significance, and what is customarily done on this day in Chabad? I would like the children's celebration not to revolve only around the cake.
Answer
The Rebbe aroused the general public to make use of this important day in a person's life as a day of seclusion and reflection upon one's past deeds and conduct, in order to examine them and improve one's ways, as well as to carry out various activities for strengthening.
"On one's birthday, a person should seclude himself, call to mind his memories and reflect upon them, and those that require correction and teshuvah – he should repent and correct them" (from the book "HaYom Yom" for the 11th of Nissan, which is the Rebbe's birthday).
The Rebbe aroused the general public to observe a series of important customs on a birthday, in order to properly make use of this important day in a person's life:
Aliyah to the Torah - on the Shabbat preceding the birthday men have an aliyah to the Torah, and in addition they also have an aliyah on the birthday itself, when that day falls on one of the days on which the Torah is read.
Tzedakah - increasing in giving tzedakah before Shacharit prayer on the birthday and likewise before Minchah. When the birthday falls on Shabbat or on a festival - one should increase in giving tzedakah on the eve of Shabbat or the festival, and it is also recommended afterwards.
Tefillah - an addition that will be expressed in the prayer itself - in the concentration of the prayer, both before the prayer - reflecting upon the greatness of the Creator and the like, and in the recitation of the Book of Tehillim, and at the very least the recitation of one of the five books (for the Book of Tehillim is divided into five books).
Studying the new chapter of Tehillim that each person says in accordance with his age. (For example: a child of 12 says chapter 13, corresponding to his thirteenth year, which he is entering. A youth of 16 says chapter 17, corresponding to his seventeenth year, and so on.)
Torah - increasing in Torah study, both in nigleh and in Chassidut (in addition to the fixed study sessions).
Reciting a maamar of Chassidut in public (all of it or part of it) on the birthday or at the nearest opportunity. And likewise especially at the time of seudah shlishit on the Shabbat closest to the birthday.
Ahavat Yisrael - increasing in influencing others out of ahavat Yisrael, in spreading the Torah and its wellsprings outward.
An accounting of the soul, in which a person should seclude himself with himself, call to mind memories of the past year, examine them and improve his ways.
Strengthening in matters of Torah and mitzvot - in honor of the private Rosh Hashanah of each and every person - which is his birthday, a person should take upon himself an additional strengthening in the observance of Torah and mitzvot - a hiddur mitzvah or some new matter. The first thing with which one should begin is adding a session of Chassidut study.
Holding a hitva'adut out of the joy of Torah and the joy of a mitzvah, as praise and thanksgiving to Hashem. The hitva'adut should be held with the members of the household, friends and companions. (If possible, one should recite the brachah of "Shehecheyanu" at the birthday hitva'adut, over a fruit or a new garment.)
From the Chabad website